A few months ago I took all of the kids to the park. As boys climbed high and jumped from heights that made me cringe, I chit chatted with the other moms. Park days are less about the kids and more about socializing. It’s like a double win, the kids get outside and hopefully burn off lots of their energy and I get the much-needed social interaction from the over 18 crowd. I think the only thing that would make them better would be a nanny to watch the kids and maybe an alcoholic beverage to sip.
One of the moms pointed out Nathaniel at the very top of the play structure. Hanging from a pole like a monkey.
I assured her I saw him. She looked at me like I was a tad bit negligent letting my two-year-old precariously perch on the precipice of the equipment. But she didn’t know Nathaniel. He’s part monkey. He’s the kid who scaled our stairs from the outside. He’s the first to climb out of the crib. He’s the one whose learned to scale my kitchen cabinets by only his toes. I had faith that he would be okay. Plus it wasn’t really that high. The worse that would happen would be a broken appendage. And really, I know this will be the kid that will see lots of emergency room time.
As we chatted, I kept an eye on him. I watched him scale the rock wall. I watched him whiz down the slide. I watched him attempt the rope ladder over and over until he got it. Each time I felt the urge to go over and help. I stopped myself. I knew he would eventually get it.
As he was swinging from the top, channeling his inner monkey, His little fingers slipped. I could see the fear in his eyes. He quickly caught himself on the lower ledge. His fingers clenched on the equipment. He started to call out for help. He was scared. He was ready to panic.
I calmly walked over. I told him to let go. He looked at me like I was absolutely crazy.
“Help”.
“Really, let go. You can do it. I promise”
“Help me!”
“Just let go. It’ll be okay”
“I can’t!”
“You can. Let go.” because he was only 4 or 5 inches off the ground at this point.
He let go. And as quickly as it all started, it was over. He bounded away to climb the rock wall and swing from the monkey bars. I went back to my friends.
I wonder how often do I find myself in a situation just praying for God to help. Hoping that super Jesus will fly in with his cape to fix it all with his side-kick Holy Spirit. As I shut my eyes tight and pray for rescue, He’s right there telling me to let go, have a little faith.
This weekend, Dave and I embarked on a great adventure. We’re shutting some doors and opening new ones. It’s a little scary, never mind, it’s down right terrifying. I pray that as we set forth, the not only will the falls be small but my faith will be large.
You have come so far. I remember you looking at me like I was crazy while I let both Nathaniel and Jacob struggle to regain their foothold. You would scold me, “Why don’t you help him, he’s falling.” And I would say, “Give him a chance to learn how to recover. It’s not over yet. He could still get back up.” Sometimes he fell, sometimes he didn’t. All the time, I think he learned.
As for our recent leap. I hope we soar. But, should we fall, I’m not worried. The Lord has never let me fall too far. Just like the song that I like to sing:
“Jesus brought me through all of my troubles.
Jesus brought me through all of my trials.
Jesus brought me through all of my heartaches.
And I know that Jesus ain`t gonna` forsake me now.”
In any case, falling and not falling is all a part of growing up. Maybe someday Nathanial will find himself saying what I always say as I dust myself off and check for blood or broken bones… “I have fallen further onto things harder.” 😉
the two of you are such great parents! honestly.
🙂 I love the ‘ur crazy’ looks from other moms!
Rayden is the one to prove everyone wrong. He doesn’t even know how bad he scares me sometimes!
The chances we take only prove to make us more confident to try a little more next time.